Silence of the Damned
by Daystar Clarion
Summary: When Naruto wakes up to a dead body in his bathroom, he begins a quick spiral into madness. Oneshot-prologue. RE-EDITED Rated for attempted suicide.


**Disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to Daystar Clarion**

**Silence of the Damned**

**By **_**Daystar Clarion**_

The moment he opened his eyes, Naruto knew he was a dead man. It was as clear as the bloody water that lapped gently against his stomach and the copper taste that clung to his taste buds. Naruto's hands gripped the side of the tub as he tried to climb to his feet, terror gripping him like a vice at the sight of the blood filled bathtub, but a pain shot up his limbs and he sat down with a solid _thunk_ and splash as the pain drew his attention. Naruto lifted his arms to examine them and had to cover his mouth as the scream of horror tried to force its way out of his throat. Dizziness came upon him as bile rose, but he managed to swallow it all down as he once again inspected his arms.

There was two long vertical gashes from wrist to the bend of his elbow, long, angry, and jagged as if the cut had been quick. They were about an inch deep, and had surely bled quite a bit, but the deep crimson water could not have come from such wounds as his. Steeling himself and the sobs that threatened to consume him, Naruto once again gripped the sides of the tub and slowly gained his feet, and cried out at the sight of his naked body, littered with gashes and lacerations from his chest to ankles. Naruto's hand flew to his mouth as the sob burst from his throat, his vision clouded by hot tears. He began to feel light-headed and swayed on his feet, but he was determined to get out of the bathroom, and as he turned towards the door, his eyes fell upon the body and he knew he was a dead man.

Lying on the bathroom floor was the body of a middle aged woman with long brown hair and pallid skin- the kind that had no blood to keep it that warm color. Her neck was twisted at an odd angle, eyes dull with death, face swollen from what looked like a beating. There was a smear of blood near her wrists and out of her mouth, but by then Naruto was hyperventilating and had yet to notice.

He had killed a villager of Konoha, a citizen- and not just any citizen-a woman, someone's wife, somebody's mommy. Naruto dropped back in the tub, breath fast and jagged, eyes fixated on the corpse. He had never killed anyone before, not even an enemy, and definitely not a civilian. He had never _tried_ to kill anyone, only incapacitate and immobilize. But here she was, not even a shinobi, lying broken on his bathroom floor. He didn't remember doing such a thing- didn't even know how he had gotten in his bathroom, or why he was naked…in his tub.

Naruto's eyes focused on the woman for a moment- ready to deny any sexual assault- but her brown pants and pink blouse were still on, and yet there was still a lack of relief. He had killed a villager.

Maybe if he was some _other_ genin he might have gotten his hitai-ate taken and receive some prison time, but he was the vessel of the Kyuubi, he was considered a demon and this was somebody's mommy.

He was aware of a keening noise and realized it was coming from his own mouth, and he buried his head in his bloody hands, ignoring the pain that racked his body. They were going to kill him. He'd never get away with something like this. His breath came in short gasps and black dots began to cloud the corner of his eyes.

**Calm yourself** a rather loud yet mellow voice said in his right ear. Naruto screamed and tried to jump to his feet, but slipped in the tub and fell on his bottom, bloody water splashing all over the floor and darkening the dead woman's hair.

"Who's there?" Naruto cried, eyes darting to the door, then at the body. The voice had been male, commanding- yet lax, as if the person it belonged to had lived a very long life, had seen many things, and had not been fazed at it all. He was sure it was not Kyuubi, for there was no violence or hate in the voice.

**Calm yourself,** the voice said again, but this time it did not sound like it was at his side but more like beyond the door. **You don't want to be hysterical. Not at a time like this.**

"Who are you?" Naruto repeated, only this time he tried to keep the tremor from his voice. "Where are you?"

**One thing at a time**, the voice replied, and this time it sounded eerily faint, as if the person had somehow faded. **You've made quite a mess here Naruto-**

"I didn't do this!" Naruto cried and slowly returned to his feet, eyes trained on the door. "I don't even know her!" His eyes fell on the body- then averted themselves.

**You're a mess,** the faint voice said. **But we can salvage this. It will be a while before she is missed**.

Naruto began to tremble, once again feeling faint. "I-I can't-''

**You must.** The voice seemed to have more strength. **You know what they'll do to you once they have seen what you have done. There'll be no mercy for Uzumaki. Then you'll see who your real friends are, the ones that aren't lurking in the shadows waiting for you to screw up**. The voice began to fade again.

Naruto's eyes fell on the body. How long had she been laying there? How long had he been in the tub? Why was he in the tub in the first place? He glanced at his arms, the gashes crimson and burning. What had happened to his body? Who had done this to him? Tears returned to his eyes and trailed down his whiskered cheeks, blue eyes trained on the door as he stood in the bloodied water. What was he supposed to do? Who was he going to tell? Iruka? He imagined the look of horror on the gentle face, and shied away from the image. Jiraiya? Kakashi? Tsunade? No. He could already feel the disappointment radiating off them.

Sasuke?

No. Sasuke was still mad at him for some unfathomable reason. He had awakened from the coma angry and after all that trouble he and Jiraiya had gone through to find Tsunade. No, Sasuke would probably sneer at him and Sakura was out of the question. Naruto moaned and kneeled in the tub, eyes covered with bloody hands.

**Calm yourself**, the voice said directly in his ear and Naruto shrieked and splashed more bloodied water on the tiles. **Tell no one, for you are alone in this. Do as I say, and you will live through this.**

Naruto's eyes darted about the bathroom.

"But where are you? I don't-''

**Unplug the bathtub.**

"W-What?"

There was a silence, as if the disembodied voice was exasperated by his stupidity- or at least- _he_ would be.

**Unplug the bathtub.** The voice was now nothing more than an echo. Naruto swallowed and reached towards the plug, the taste of iron coating his tongue. He wanted to be sick. His fingers found the chain to the plug and with a sharp pull, the stopper popped free and the sound of gurgling water filled the oppressive silence. Naruto watched the level drop around him as the water sank into the drain. At any moment he felt like he was about to go insane.

_Ididn'tdothisIdidn'tdothisIdidn'tdothisIdidn'tdothisIdidn'tdothisIdidn'tdothis._

It was like a mantra in his head. The last gurgle of water sank into the drain, but the tub still had blood stains. Naruto returned to his feet and eyed the door. Where was the man who owned that calm voice? Was he using a jutsu? Was this whole moment a genjutsu? Was it the evil machination of the Akatsuki? Was Uchiha Itachi and his shark faced partner just beyond the door?

**Take a shower Naruto. Wash the blood from your body; take care of your wounds.**

Naruto balked. "But what about…her?" He did not know the woman's name- had never seen her before.

**Don't worry about her. She will not be going anywhere; we will take care of her. But first we must take care of you. Take a shower.**

His hand was moving toward the handles before he even realized it, and he turned on the hot water. His wounds ached, he felt sick with fear and horror, and yet, he listened to the voice because it kept him from the brink, kept him from cowering in the tub until someone found him. When his body was clean, Naruto dropped the lid on his toilet and stepped onto it, hissing in pain but refusing to step on the bloodied floor. From there he opened the cabinet behind the mirror and pulled out his first aid kit.

Why weren't the cuts healing like every other wound he had received? Why Now? His face paled and he froze amidst wrapping his left leg. Had the Kyuubi done this? Somehow possessed him and lured the woman here to die?

He was twice dead then.

Naruto wiped fresh tears and focused on wrapping his wounds. When it was all done, he sat on the toilet, knees drawn to chest, and waited, eyes focused on the battered waxen face.

**Come out of the bathroom, get dressed. We have much to do today.**

Naruto opened his mouth, perhaps to ask what they were going to do, but shut it with an audible click and crawled onto the counter top, reaching for the doorknob.

Barely thirteen and already on death row.

Naruto pulled the door open, leaped over the body and twisted himself into the hallway, slamming the door shut behind him. Immediately his eyes searched for the man of whom the voice belonged to, but the hallway remained dark and oppressive.

"Where are you?" Naruto called and stepped toward the living room, taking in the kitchen as well since they were both connected in his small apartment. The living room was littered with ramen cups and old discarded scrolls from the Ninja Academy and his kitchen looked much the same.

**I'm in your bedroom.** Again the voice was like a distant echo. Naruto spun on his heel and stared at his bedroom door, which was slightly ajar. Naruto swallowed, throat suddenly dry as he took a shaky step towards the bedroom. Whoever it was, was in there, and he was having a hard time picturing him. Would he be cloaked in a black coat with crimson clouds or would he be some deceptively young man with eyes older than time?

Naruto was at his door, heart pounding in his ears even as he strained to hear some sort of sound from the room. He lifted his hand and slowly pushed the door open, eyes immediately taking in the scene. His room was empty. There was clothing littering the floor, a few comic books lay on his rumpled bed along with a stuffed animal. His closet was open, clear for all to see that there was no one occupying the space and more ramen and scrolls completed the scene.

Was this some cruel joke someone was playing on him? Perhaps it was a fake corpse in the bathroom? Naruto lifted a hand to scratch his head and his arm burned, causing his eyes to fall to his bandages.

No. The pain was real. This was real…

"Where are you?" his voice seemed obscenely loud in the silence. His eyes darted around his room.

**I'm right here.** the voice was close this time, like right in the room, and Naruto's eyes darted to the ceiling, half-expecting to see a ghost of some type. But no one was there. Naruto gave a weak laugh and ran a hand over his face.

_Don'tloseitdon'tloseitdon'tloseitdon'tloseitdon'tloseit…_

His eyes fell on his bed again and connected with the black beaded eyes of the stuffed frog-polyester and cotton. Naruto backed up into the hallway and dropped to his knees, feeling cold. The frog sat amongst his rumpled covers, in its normal crouching position, and he was sure it was watching him, like those dead plastic eyes held some kind of life behind them. This was madness.

"I-It can't be…" Naruto rasped, eyes stuck on the now seemingly sinister frog.

**Calm yourself.** The voice came clearly, and yet, it still seemed that it might have come from somewhere else.

"It's not possible! You're not real!" His eyes darted around. "This must be a genjutsu. Yes, that's it!" Naruto jumped to his feet and ran to his dresser, pulling out a pair of plaid boxer and shoving them on, ignoring the constant burn of his wounds. He dashed out of his room and into the living-room.

"Okay!" he shouted, tears once again clouding his vision. "I get it! Ha-ha! Wimpy Naruto!" He rushed to his balcony and pushed aside his blinds, stepping out. "You can sto-'' Words died in his throat.

Konoha was silent, the streets vacant. Naruto eyes moved to the predawn sky and true dread descended upon him.

**Hush, don't wake them- don't draw attention to your enemies,** the voice said, an opaque echo.

"Enemies?" Naruto whispered weakly, sinking back into the living room.

**Everyone is your enemy now Naruto.**

Naruto slumped on the couch and stared at the floor. All his dreams, crushed between one moment and the next, dreams that now seemed so fragile. How easily it could be ruined by one wrong move, the one move everyone was hoping he would make- the move he never imagined making. He was never going to get away with this.

**Get up, we have work to do.**

Naruto lifted his head and stared past the hallway and into his bedroom where the frog sat on his bed, beady black eyes trained on him.

"This is not a genjutsu?" he asked hopefully, wishing it were so. The frog continued to stare at him; Naruto's shoulders dropped. "Have I lost my mind? Am I crazy? Is that why I killed her? _Who_ is she?" The questions poured out of him.

**Get up,** the voice commanded in reply, and Naruto found himself on his feet. **Put your clothes on and retrieve the katana from your closet**.

Naruto stood in place, mind racing at the orders. Maybe he should call Iruka-sensei…But he was already walking down the hall, already putting on the black shirt and orange pants- already digging in the back of the closet to retrieve the discarded katana he had picked up back in Wave Country where it had been abandoned by Gatou's men.

Already he was following orders.

Naruto pulled out the sheathed blade and turned to the frog, who remained in the same position, staring lidlessly at the door. He didn't know why he expected the stuffed animal to move. A sigh wafted through the air.

**I suppose it will have to do- though it would have been better if you had an axe.**

Naruto blanched in horror. "What the hell would you want me to do with an axe?" Okay, this was insane. He talking to a _stuffed frog._

**Eat breakfast. You'll be going out.**

Naruto was moving toward the kitchen before he was even aware of it. "Why? Where am I going?" he asked as he pulled out a cup of instant ramen from a cabinet, his stomach twisting at the sight of food. There was a dead woman in the bathroom and he was taking orders from a stuffed animal.

**Have you ever made stew before?**

Naruto froze while peeling back the lid and slowly turned towards the hallway, then moved a bit towards the right until the bedroom came into view and the frog could be seen on the bed, watching him.

"Why do you ask?" Naruto questioned, dread returning.

**You'll be making a lot of stew today Naruto. A lot.**

Going into the now awake village was like being a maggot crawling along an ant trail. At any moment, someone would- could cry out his evil deed and the villagers could quickly become a mob. Naruto hunched his shoulders at the occasional cold glare and zipped up his orange jacket.

**Calm yourself. Draw too much attention and you'll be remembered. You don't want to be remembered when the woman is missed.** The voice came from behind him, making Naruto jump and twitch, but he kept walking, face grim and eyes darting here and there.

"How are you here?" he asked in a mumbled. "Shouldn't you be in my room?"

The voice made no reply and Naruto returned to looking for a grocery store or some kind of vegetable stand. Entering one, he quickly rushed to the fresh produce section, immediately grabbing carrots, tomatos, peas, and other items he imagined went into a stew. As he piled them in a basket and hovered over the cabbages, he once again began to go through the series of unfortunate events that had taken place.

1. Out of the blue, he had awakened in his bathtub, naked with a dead woman- drained of blood ( most likely in his bathtub), on his floor.

2. He had mysterious gashes on his body-all of which he didn't recall receiving and curiously won't heal.

3. Somehow, a disembodied voice that apparently comes from the stuffed frog he had bought in a village outside of Konoha when he and Jiraiya had been searching for Tsunade, was now giving him orders.

"Hey Uzumaki," a lazy voice drawled and Naruto looked up to see Shikamaru standing near him in a slightly slumped manner, dark brown eyes focused on him-yet half-lidded. But there was no mistake, those eyes took in everything. "You having someone over for dinner or somethin'?" His eyes fell on the overflowing basket full of vegetables.

Naruto stared almost uncomprehendingly at the recently promoted chuunin before giving him a weak smile in reply.

Shikamaru's eyes ran over his face.

"You okay Naruto? You look pretty pale."

**Be quick,** the voice said directly in his ear, and he jumped and twitched before bestowing a shaky smile that seemed more like a grimace upon the chuunin.

"No. Um, actually, I ate a bad cup of ramen and figured I need to lay off the salt for a while and eat some greens," he managed to a give a weak laugh. "I've had a stomach virus all night."

Shikamaru nodded and gave a small chuckle.

"Yes, I wondered when you would lose interest in that cup of salt…"

Naruto gave another nod and smile before quickly heading towards the cashier, hunching his shoulders when he felt Shikamaru's eyes follow him.

Standing in front of the door, Naruto stared at the numbers vacantly, hands full of bags. He didn't want to go back in there, didn't want to go back to that dead woman, back to the end of his life.

**Go in Naruto. We have work to do.**

Naruto sniffed and twitched a shoulder before jamming the key into the lock and slipping into his apartment. Everything was exactly as he had left it, the stale smell of ramen covering up the scent of blood. Naruto dropped the bags on the kitchen table and wiped sweaty hands on his pants, eyes drawn to his bathroom.

**What's the matter Naruto? You've seen a dead body before. Why are you so shaken?** the voice was in his ear again. Naruto scratched the ear in agitation and inhaled deeply.

"Yeah, but I've never killed anyone before."

**So you admit to it?**

Naruto blinked rapidly.

"I-I didn't-" Naruto's mouth shut with an audible click and his hand ran over his face and mouth. Silence reigned in the apartment; even the plants seemed to feel the tension.

**It doesn't matter,** the voice said from a distance. **Get the katana, cut up the woman, and put her in the stew.**

Naruto would have been appalled if he had not already been at his wits end. Already there was a buzzing in his ears and his body began to feel numb. His tongue felt swollen in his mouth and he had to swallow several time before he could speak.

"Why do something like that? Why can't we put her in the river or bury her?" He couldn't believe he had just asked such a heartless question like that.

**Don't be an idiot!** the voice rang throughout the apartment. **Everyone does stupid things like that! That's where the authorities will look. In rivers, in the earth, in some pathetic alley somewhere. But they'll never think to look in a stew. And if they can't find the body, they'll never find you…if you do as I say. Serial killers are always caught because they have no imagination.**

Naruto did not like being compared to a serial killer. "Do you want me to eat the stew?"

**What a strange question**, the voice whispered distantly. **Do you _want_ to eat the stew, Naruto?**

Naruto's shoulders slumped and he headed for his bedroom, eyeing the frog where it still sat on his bed and grabbed the katana before heading for the bathroom. "I'm never going to get away with this," he muttered as he opened the bathroom door. It banged against her foot, and he slipped inside. There was blood on the toilet seat, the floor, and the woman's skin was now a grayish color. Naruto stood in the corner and stared at the body.

**Time is not going to stand still for you, Naruto. Be quick, cut everything- bones included. There will be no evidence of this incident when we are done.**

Naruto moved from his corner and stood beside the woman. He gripped the katana and raised it over his head and exhaled flatly.

The katana whistled at it descended.

Sakura rubbed her hands together and glanced at Sasuke and Kakashi-sensei, both of whom seemed troubled. Sasuke's face was set in that familiar blank brooding expression while Kakashi-sensei eyed his dirty book. The three of them sat and watched for the last member of their team, and for once, Sakura was worried that Naruto would not show up. She had seen the hurt on his face when Sasuke had charged up his chidori, and she didn't blame him. Sasuke had been acting strange ever since he'd gotten that strange tattoo from Orochimaru on his neck- been more distant- more angry. Naruto had gone to help him, but Sasuke seemed angry with him. She didn't understand it.

But what she did understand was the possible avoidance that must be taking place. Naruto was always first to team meetings, so it was weird that he hadn't shown up yet- unless he was showing his displeasure towards Sasuke. If only she had the balls to tell her crush off, she would, but there she stood, glancing in the direction she hoped Naruto would come, and alternating between eyeing Sasuke and Kakashi-sensei.

Then she saw Naruto, and before she could feel relief, she took in how his feet dragged, the pallor of his skin, and the dark circles around his eyes, even his hair lacked its usual spiky luster and seemed to hang in his face, which was odd until she noticed he wasn't wearing his hitai-ate. Which was unusual, even for him

Naruto trudged up to his team mates and stopped, hands shoved in his pockets, eyes focused on the cobbled ground.

"Where's your hitai-ate Naruto?" she asked cheerfully, putting on her friendliest smile. Kakashi snapped his book shut and watched Naruto curiously as well. She could even see Sasuke watching him.

Naruto gave a twitch at the sound of her voice and looked up with tired eyes. A hand flew to his forehead and he greeted them with an empty smile.

"Ah…I had a rough night. Must have forgotten to put it on, no sleep and all…" He hadn't even glanced Sasuke's way. "So what are we doing today?"

It was three days later after a D ranked mission that he saw her, the woman he had killed. She looked healthy, happy, and so full of life that they almost seemed like two different people. But it was her.

Name: Taguchi Makoto

Age: 31

Height: 5ft 6in

Weight: 130lbs

Wife and mother of two

Last seen at the west end Market

**Taguchi Makoto…our mystery woman now has a name- or had one. She is nothing now, Naruto. Forget her. Move on and no one will even imagine your involvement.**

"Hey Naruto! Are you coming?" Sakura called, and Naruto followed after them quickly.

"My cuts have healed. Why did it take so long for them to heal? Where did they come from? Did she do it to me?"

There was no reply from the voice, and Naruto separated from his teammates with a quick 'see you later.' He returned to his apartment with its clean surfaces and cleanser scent. He sat at his kitchen table, and under that scent lay the rich scent of stew. His tired eyes darted to his stove, a stove that had spent all night heating up six pots of stewed Makoto. He had dumped all the pots in the dumpster where it would surely be eaten by the hungry rats that dug through the trash nightly. Images of himself chopping her poor body flashed through his mind, and he flinched miserably.

**Go to sleep Naruto. You have not slept in some time. Rest yourself. You'll feel better in the morn-**

"SHUT UP!" Naruto shouted suddenly, and jumped to his feet, knocking his chair to the floor. "STOP talking to me! _Who_ are you?" He dashed into the bedroom and grabbed the katana that lay under the bed. He turned toward the frog and in a rage, brought the katana down on the stuffed animal, stabbing it through its polyester back. He hacked away as fast as he could, tearing through fabric and pulling out the cotton innards, until his breath was short and the head was the only thing whole. Naruto staggered back, trying to catch his breath, while the frog's head stared at him accusingly.

**Well, that was pointless,** the voice hissed. **But tell me, do you feel better?**

Naruto ran from the room and flopped on the couch, catching his breath before he curled up in a ball and tried to shut the world out.

And his thoughts returned Naruto, which was no surprise since the blond idiot was all he could think about, and his new ascension to power that the dead-last had somehow acquired. He had been shocked at the display when the blond fought against Gaara of the Sand, had been enraged when Itachi had shown interest in him. And even the skirmish he had initiated had shown how much Naruto had improved. But how? Did he have to leave Konoha too? Did he need a sannin to acquire the power he needed for vengeance? And then there was Naruto himself, who for the last week had shown some unnatural behavior toward his team mates and sensei. He seemed preoccupied, distant, and often agitated. At first he thought Naruto was mad at him, upset about the skirmish on the hospital roof, and he could admit he was out of line, but it wasn't like Naruto to hold a grudge. But maybe it wasn't him. Maybe Naruto was upset about something else.

Whatever it was, it was interfering with training.

He had half the mind to show up at Naruto's door and ask what his deal was. But why did he care anyway? Naruto just got in the way. Everyone in this village got in his way. Maybe he needed to find another path to power.

Naruto wasn't his concern.

Guilt and shame. Two states of being that were horrible when combined, and they lay upon his soul like a suffocating blanket. When he woke to the smell of blood and the now familiar burn of his body, he did not scream, he did not cry, he only shut he eyes and took a deep breath. He laid his head back and let his emotions run over him, and was not surprised when it was so few. Guilt…shame…and exhaustion. He was so tired, physically, mentally, emotionally. It had been two weeks since Taguchi Makoto, and he had lost ten pounds in that time. His teammates kept asking him what was wrong; Iruka had even stopped by to see if he was alright. Tsunade hadn't asked him if he was okay, but her eyes did all the questioning- the eyes of a medic nin that surely saw the ten pounds he was missing.

He was just too tired to feel all that much beyond guilt and shame. He lifted an arm and stared at the gash that started mid-arm to elbow and wondered why whoever had done this just didn't cut an artery and be done with. His tired blue eyes moved to the body. It was a man, from what he could see, and he turned away to stare at the porcelain wall.

**You've had your moment**, the voice echoed from a distance again. **Now we must get to work. Clean yourself, get dressed**.

He asked no questions. He unplugged the tub like it was a ritual, turned on the shower even as the blood drained and began to wash his burning body. He vaguely noticed that the lacerations were in the same places as the previous, but he was too numb to care. When he was as clean as was physically possible he bandaged his wounds, and that's when he really looked at the man and noticed the two gaping holes where his eyes should have been. Naruto quickly got off the toilet and without care turned the mans' body over, seeing that his neck had been squeezed and his head bashed in at the back. But he was more concerned about the missing eyes.

"Where are they?" he whispered, looking in the bathtub, which was empty, then the rest of the bathroom, which was only smeared with blood. He dragged the man about the bathroom, searching frantically for the eyes. When the bathroom proved void of eyes, he ran into the living room and began his frantic search. "Where are they?" he began to feel again, and this time it was terror. He searched his room, where the frog remained on the bed along with its stuffing, then his kitchen and laundry closet. But there were no eyes.

**I don't think they're in here…** the voice said in a strangely hushed voice, and Naruto stopped his dash into the living room, eyes darting around. He swallowed…and something lodged in his throat, something had come up. Naruto choked and spat whatever was in his throat into his hand. His pupils contracted. It was half of an eyeball, a black bloodied iris staring up at him.

**Naruto!** a voice called as his vision darkened, and Naruto's eyes rolled right up into his head and fell back into the carpet in a dead faint.

**Naruto.**

Gray light was intruding upon the blessed darkness. Someone groaned.

**NARUTO, **The voice was directly in his ear, and Naruto was jolted from unconsciousness. He was lying on his back, and for a second he was confused. Then it all came back to him, and it took all he had to make it to the kitchen sink and throw up all the contents of his stomach. Then he sagged against the kitchen sink cabinet and stared dully at nothing.

**Naruto. Get up.**

Naruto shook his head and shut his eyes, his body beginning to tremble.

**Naruto you must get up. What if someone comes in and sees this? What will they say?**

Naruto opened his eyes and whispered, "Monster."

**Do you want to hear your teammates say that to you Naruto? It would kill you.**

"I'm already dead," was the blonde's reply.

**Do you want to die with that word on your friends lips?**

No. No he didn't. As a matter of fact, that would be the worst thing in the world. Naruto pulled himself to his feet, feeling his legs tremble with the strain, and waited for the ominous commands that he knew the voice would be issuing out.

**Good. This is good Naruto,** the voice whispered. **Open the kitchen sink and get that powdered cleanser you have under there. **Naruto bent down and opened the kitchen sink and pulled out the all of them.** Good. Here's what you are going to do. Strip the body of meat and organs. Put them in the garbage disposal. When that is done, you will grind up the bones to a fine powder, use a mortar and pestle for that- yes you have one in that far cabinet. When you have ground up every thing, pour all the cleanser into it and throw it out. Anyone who looks will think you have thrown out outdated detergent.**

"But that could take days…" Naruto whispered weakly.

_**Use your shadow clones, Naruto!**_ the voice sounded angry.

Naruto turned toward the bathroom and covered his mouth.

What else had he eaten?

The councilman was glaring at her, and she managed to swallow the impatience that wanted to come out. She didn't know why she had to deal with these old outdated bastards whose minds still seemed about three decades behind.

"We'll do everything we can to find your son, councilman. I assure you, I have already sent several chuunin out to investigate."

"Chuunin! I don't want chuunin searching for my son! I want Anbu- hell! I want your best Hunter on it Tsunade!"

Before Tsunade could reply, the man stormed out of the room, and as the last of him disappeared, Jiraiya appeared with a smoky pop. He glanced back at the slamming door before lifting a hand in greeting and slumped down in front of her.

"What's up Tsunade?"

The Godaime sat back in her seat with a sigh and glanced at the picture at the corner of her desk, a grinning Naruto with a laughing Jiraiya ruffling his hair. She looked at the Toad Sannin.

"I need you to go check up on Naruto. He hasn't been doing so well, so much that he's looking sick and many of us are noticing. He won't say anything to me or his teammates. Perhaps he'll say something to you. Take him out for ramen or something- whatever it takes. I want to know what's hurting him"_ I want to know why I feel so much dread when I think of him._

Jiraiya stared at her for a moment before nodding and jumping to his feet. "I'm on it," he said with a grin that eased the worry in her for a moment before popping out of existence.

There was knock on his door, and all his bunshin froze in their work. Naruto looked up at the door from his place in the kitchen, where he had recently placed the last of the man in the disposal. He glanced back at his bunshin, and watched as the last of the grinded bone was poured into the bucket full of bleach cleanser. There was another knock as the bunshin shook the bucket to mix up bone and cleanser, and he flipped the switch on the disposal to grind and destroy lasting evidence of the man. Then he went to the door and opened it.

Jiraiya blinked down at him, then smiled. "Hey brat, what have you been up to?" His eyes darted around to the several bunshin that stood in his living room. The heavy smell of bleach assaulted his nose as he glanced down again at his student. Naruto looked like shit. Bruised eyes, waxen skin, and the ten pounds he somehow knocked off were showing, and it wasn't flattering.

"Nothing," Naruto said, and his voice was a faint rasp, as if he spent it all on screaming. "Was going to clean my place but my bleach expired and I have to throw it out." At this a bunshin picked up the bucket full of the cleanser and strode past him and down the stairs toward the garbage.

"Oh," Jiraiya said, at a loss for words. He so did not know how to deal with a quiet Naruto. "That's perfect then. Do you want to get ramen or something? My treat," he said with a wink, but his grin faded when Naruto began to walk away from him and the bunshin popped and dissipated. The blond glanced back at him and gave a wan smile- hell, it didn't even qualify as one.

"No, I'm sorry. I've been under the weather lately, and I don't feel like eating right now. Thanks for the offer though. Maybe I'll take you up on the offer some other time." But by the way he said it, it was eerily clear that there would be no 'other time.' Something was seriously wrong here. He stepped into the room as Naruto dusted some powder off of his floor and placed some dishes in the sink.

"Naruto," he called in a serious voice, and the youth turned tired blue eyes on him, and waited quietly for him to continue. This was too unnatural.

"Is something bothering you? I heard you got into a fight with Uchiha some time ago. Wanna tell me about it?" He sat on the window sill and made his face look as understanding as possible. But that began to fade at the puzzled look on Naruto's face, a look that said clearly, 'what fight?' Then the eyes deepened, as if Naruto was forcing himself to remember, and then his eyebrows rose in surprise.

"Oh. That. What about it?"

This was not going well.

"Naruto, everyone is worried about you. You don't look well. If something's bugging you, let us know- we'd love to help you out. We're your friends, Naruto; we won't turn our backs on you."

His touching speech was rewarded by a burst of laughter, a wry bitter laughter that sent chills down his spine. Naruto ran a hand over his face and through his hair before he hiccupped to silence and smiled grimly at the sannin.

"It's nothing like that perv-sannin. It's merely just a case of bad ramen and some unhappy trips to the toilet; we've gotten to know each other so well lately. I think it's just food poisoning. I'll be alright. Tell everyone not to worry." He then turned and picked up the empty cylinders of bleach cleanser and tossed them in a bag. It was like from one moment to the next, he had forgotten that Jiraiya was still there.

As Jiraiya left, he wondered who would give him reassurance that Naruto was okay. Because it was obvious that he wasn't.

The very next day he was rewarded with the name of his newest victim. Hiyakawa Hatori. They were doing every thing to find him…because he was a councilman's son. He had killed a councilman's son. He was definitely dead- as a matter of fact, he was already dead- he was just too stupid to lay down. How many more people would he kill?

**You don't think your being set up, Naruto?** the opaque voice asked.

Would they scream monster at him when they found out the truth- when they killed him? Naruto's eyes darted around. He had been on his way to meet Sakura and Sasuke; Kakashi had been sent on a mission, but now he knew he couldn't. What if he suddenly woke and they were dead? What if he killed them? Killed his precious people? Naruto turned back and returned to his apartment. He shut the door behind him and headed for the bathroom.

**What are you doing, Naruto?** the voice asked calmly.

"I'm ending this," he stated firmly, and shut his bathroom door. He pulled out a kunai and meant to run it across his wrists, but startled himself when he simply ran it from mid- forearm to the bend of his elbow. He stared in shock at the wound before raising his eyes to the mirror. "I've been doing this to myself the whole time," he whispered, eyes wide in realization. He lifted up his shirt and ran the kunai along the ghost of the previous gashes, watching the recently healed skin split under the sharp kunai. He dropped the kunai and dashed from the bathroom, running into his bedroom closet and grabbing the rope that lay curled in the back of his closet.

He didn't remember slinging the rope to the ceiling fan, or making the second loop, or getting the chair for that matter and standing on it. He only became aware as he put his head through the loop. He froze with the voice in his ear…the voice sounding eerily just like his own.

**Are you sure Naruto? Are you sure?** his voice asked and his eyes filled with tears.

"Yes. Yes, I'm sure. I just don't know why," the tears escaped his eyes and fell down his face. "But I'm sure, cuz I don't want to be a monster. I don't want them to know that I'm a monster."

**Okay Naruto. Okay.**

The loop was around his neck, all he had to do was kick the chair from under him. His eyes fell on the picture of Team Seven, how they looked happy, even Sasuke looked like he was trying to hide the grin just beneath the surface. Maybe he should leave a note?

**No, no goodbyes,** his voice said to him, and he nodded. He summoned his courage and kicked the chair from under him.

He was choking, so much pressure on his face, he felt like his eyes were going to pop out. His vision was red, he couldn't breath, he was scared-couldn't breath- legs kicking- hands scratching his neck- can't breath- something stopping him from grabbing the rope- weak-can't breath-scared-

Then-

A woman. With brown hair. Makoto? Walking, smiling. Looks at him- face twists- words come out of her mouth. Words that hurt. Wants to shut her up. Alley- Hitting her-ripping out her foul tongue- eating it-

A man- walking smiling. Looks at him- eyes like burning embers- so much hate- want to eat his eyes out-swallowing eyes-

Eyes…with so much hate- like burning embers- glowing- red- sound of a thousand birds in the air- looking at him- hating him- he doesn't know why- cannot hate him back- can only hurt deep inside-red pinwheel eyes- hating him…and he doesn't know why.

Oblivion.

"Seriously? Of all people? Naruto?" Kiba asked incredulously as he followed Shikamaru toward Uzumaki's apartment. Along with the two of them were Akimichi Chouji, and Hyuuga Neji, who had questioned the reason as to why he should give a damn that Uchiha had defected and turned traitor. Shikamaru had reasoned that though he really didn't care either, the Hokage had given him the mission of retrieving him since the village was low on ninja at the moment. Tsunade-sama had charged the tactician with assembling a team, and he felt that the Hyuuga technique was needed, as well as the Inuzuka ability for tracking. Naruto was needed for his sheer determination and unpredictability, and the hope that he would be able to persuade the stupid Uchiha into coming back.

"You know, I heard Uzumaki was sick or something," Kiba said as they walked up the stairs. "and I haven't seen in him in a while."

Shikamaru shrugged and knocked on the door, waiting impatiently for the blond to answer the door. A sound came from behind him, and he turned to see that Neji had the Byakugan activated. His eyes were wide around the veins, and his normally pale skin had turned so ghostly that they could see the veins under his skin. Shikamaru spun around and kicked open the door, dashing into the apartment and was shoved aside as Neji flew past him and ran for the bedroom door. He threw it open with one hand while with the other he tossed a kunai. Shikamaru was behind him, so he couldn't see who the perpetrator was, but he heard the solid thunk of a body hit the floor as he moved into the room.

Then the scene reared its ugly head, and he heard Kiba gasp behind him. There was a chair lying on the floor, a rope hanging from the ceiling, and Naruto lying on the floor. The blood that had been forced to his face was slowly draining away as Neji wiped his face and immediately began to perform CPR. The sounds of his counting as he pumped Naruto's chest, as his own eyes trailed over the gashes going up his arm, would haunt him to the day he died.

"_Ohmanohmanohman,_" Inuzuka was chanting behind him, and Shikamaru turned to see him hugging Akamaru tightly to his chest. His wild eyes connected with his own. "This ain't right man, this ain't right."

"Chouji go get the Hokage," Shikamaru ordered calmly, and his friend's pale round face turned to him. He dropped the bag of chips and ran out of the room.

"He's breathing," Neji's ragged voice came from behind him. Shikamaru took a deep breath and turned back to the scene, knelt down next to the Hyuuga to see his friend. The blood vessels in Naruto's eyes had all popped, covering the white's of his eyes crimson. The rope had dug and wrung skin from his neck, and his face had scratch marks all along his jaw. Neji rubbed his eyes and stared down at the blond, whose eyes, though open, remained vacant.

"I-I don't understand…" the Hyuuga whispered, and he grabbed Naruto's arm and stared at the long gash along the length. He let the hand drop and covered his eyes again.

There was a loud pop, and two people appeared, the Hokage and her assistant Shizune.

"Naruto!" she cried and dropped to her knees beside the limp body. "goddammit!"

Shikamaru pulled Neji back and they stood by and watched both medic nins begin to work on him.

"Nara, you still have a mission to do," her voice came hollow and she never looked at them. "Get another and find Uchiha! Bring him back, dead or alive." And she looked at him, and he wasn't sure whether she cared which it was. And at the moment, he didn't either. He turned from the scene and motioned for Hyuuga and Inuzuka to follow him.

They'd get Lee. Then they'd get Uchiha Sasuke.

Kakashi returned to Konoha from his reconnaissance mission with plans. First go to report his findings, visit Obito, then see to his Team. Have a deep talk with Sasuke, find out what was bugging Naruto. He had to start taking better care of his team. As he moved to Hokage Tower, he noticed other ninja glancing at him and whispering to one another. This wasn't exactly that big of a deal; he was used to the whispers, being infamous and all, but there was something foreboding about these stares. As he came to the Hokage's door, the Anbu placed there opened the door and waved him in- which was not good.

Upon entering the room, he noticed two things. Three people occupied the room, and two of the three were crying. Jiraiya was standing next to Tsunade-sama, a comforting hand on her shoulder, though it seemed that he too needed comforting, for his face was twisted in a painful grimace. The Hokage had a picture in her hand resting at arms length, and tear streaks marked her face- she had been crying for some time judging by the red puffy eyes. But it was the third person standing alone and sniveling in her hands that made the dread descend upon him.

"No," he whispered, and Sakura's head jerked up at the sound of his voice.

"Sensei!" she wailed and threw herself at the jounin, arms wrapping around his ribs and blubbered into his chest.

"What happened," the jounin demanded, eye wide.

Jiraiya turned to him, and for a moment it seemed as if he didn't see him, but his eyes focused and he spoke.

"Uchiha Sasuke defected; he's going to the Sound," Kakashi felt cold, and he put an arm around Sakura. "We already sent a Team out after him."

Kakashi nodded and waited for the next shoe to drop. Jiraiya rubbed his face and looked out the window. Tsunade never took her eyes off the portrait as she spoke in a wavering voice.

"Naruto hung himself in his bedroom."

The words were like lead to his heart. Kakashi staggered back and stared in horror at the Hokage. Sakura's sobbing was becoming louder. "What?"

"He was saved in time," Tsunade wiped more tears from her swollen eyes, "but the lack of oxygen shut down important parts of his brain that we can't activate." Her eyes fell on him, devastating in their pain. "He's alive… but he's as good as dead."

When he later entered the room, after he had gotten ready to follow the Team out to find Sasuke, he steeled his heart to the sight he was about to see. But the room was white, and peaceful, with flowers beside the bed. His eyes fell on Umino Iruka, the Academy Chuunin, and one of the closest people to Naruto's heart. The man was pallid, and his eyes were tired and hurt. He looked up from the bed and his lips turned into a hard line before he looked back down to the figure that lay in the bed amongst the beeping machines.

Kakashi moved and stood by the bed, then looked down at his number one loud mouthed ninja. Naruto lay amongst the sheets, tubed up- and yet he didn't look so bad. His wounds, whatever they were, had been healed, and though he was pale and thin, he didn't seem to be in any pain. He just seemed to be in a deep sleep.

"Sasuke gave no warning," Iruka said suddenly, taking Naruto's limp hand in his, "and no one saw him near Naruto's apartments, so he couldn't have known that Sasuke was leaving. It must have been something else-'' he gave a hoarse dry laugh. "I wonder what it could have been." There was sarcasm in that last sentence.

Kakashi remained silent.

"She said that…" and here he choked. "Even if Naruto wakes, there'll be no one there. That he's gone." The Chuunin's eyes filled with tears and he looked away, gritting his teeth.

Kakashi shut his eye tightly, took a deep breath and looked at the chuunin. "I have to go get Sasuke," he said quietly and turned towards the door.

"You do that," Iruka's voice followed him bitterly out the door and into the hall.

Iruka looked down at his favorite student and gripped his hand tightly. "Please come back Naruto," he whispered, but there wasn't so much as a spike in the heart monitor. The door opened, and Shizune entered.

"Umino-san, you've been here for days. Why don't you go home and get some rest. We'll let you know if there are any changes." But the look in her eyes said clearly that there weren't going to be any. Iruka swallowed, and his shoulders slumped as he stood up and slowly exited the room, eyes falling on the blond.

When was the shock going to wear off?

The door shut behind them.

The room was engulfed in silence but for the steady beat of the machines

Naruto's eyes darted open, blue assaulting the world, but they were vacant, and they stared at the ceiling without seeing it. The heart monitor remained steady. The room remained quite, a deep silence.

The silence of the damned.

**Fin **

**Mind you, this one-shot is more like a prelude or prologue to another fanfic in the future. Um, if you're wondering about the voice, it wasn't a separate entity- Naruto was just talking to himself, which he realizes before he hangs himself. Um, the reason he thought it was the frog was because he needed to objectify it before he went insane- which was pointless because he'd already lost it.**

**Why did he lose it? Or when? He lost it on the hospital roof when Sasuke attacked him with the chidori, and he with the rasengan. Then when the villagers were rude to him he simply did what we all wished he would do.**

**Kyuubi actually had nothing to do with this- but he will in the next fic.**

**This was my first One-Shot EVER.**


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